Rib Aching funny

This is the ultimate "get back at ya" I've ever heard of!!!!
Blessed are those who can give without remembering & take without
forgetting.


THE CURTAIN RODS

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates, and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of chardonnay.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and stuffed half- eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of all of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days. Then, slowly, the house began to smell.



They tried everything; cleaning, mopping, and airing the place out. Vents were checked for dead rodents, carpets were steam cleaned, and air fresheners were hung everywhere!

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked.

People stopped coming over to visit.

Repairmen refused to work in the house.

The maid quit.

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and, eventually, even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going.

He told her the saga of the rotting house.

She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.

Knowing his ex-w ife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but only if she were to sign the papers that very day.

She agreed, and,within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later, the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home, including the curtain rods.

I just love a happy ending, don't you?

KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

Greasies: Common term for fish and chips, probably because they usually are! (greasy that is)

Rocket's Request

"OK ! it is time for me to take a nap. Would you all please keep the noise level down a little?"

Cream Cheese Fruit Clouds

A tasy way to enjoy all the sweet berries and fruit available right now, is to pile them on a cloud of cream cheese.

You will need:

1 8oz. cream cheese, softened
1/2 cup sugar
1 tbsp. lemon juice
2 tsp. grated lemon peel
1 cup whipping cream, whipped
and all of your favorite fruits

Combine cream cheese, sugar, juice and peel, mix until well blended
Fold in whipped cream
Using back of spoon, shape on waxed paper-lined cookie sheet to form ten shells
Freeze
When ready to serve, fill with an assortment of fruits.

You can also spread the prepared cream cheese mixture in an 8x8 pan and freeze. Cut into squares and top with fruit.

Thursday Chuckle

It is good to start the day with a laugh. Thanks to my friend Linda for this.

YOUNGER vs OLDER GENERATION

A very self-important college freshman attending a recent football game, took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it was impossible for the older generation to understand his generation.

"You grew up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one," the student said, loud enough for many of those nearby to hear. "The young people of today grew up with television, jet planes, space travel, man walking on the moon, our spaceships have visited Mars. We have nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers with light-speed processing ...and," pausing to take another drink of beer...

The Senior took advantage of the break in the student's litany and said, "You're right, son. We didn't have those things when we were young...so we invented them. Now, you arrogant little s***head, what are you doing for the next generation?"

I love this senior.

New Zealand Greenstone

When the first white settlers arrived on the West Coast of the South Island of New Zealand they found that the Maori were using tough, hard and very beautiful green stone to make war weapons, cutting and carving tools and articles of personal adornment, such as a Tiki.

Prized for its rich color and remarkable translucency, New Zealand greenstone is found almost exclusively on the West Coast of the South Island. In rugged river valleys accessible only by helicopter,



The Maori called the stone Pounamu, which literally translated means Green Stone. The settlers, ignorant of the fact that the stone was in fact Nephrite Jade, put the two words together and gave it the distinctive name - Greenstone - and it is still known in New Zealand by this name.







The Maori (a poetical race) gave names and meanings to the many shades of green in the stone:
Inanga (Whitebait) - very pale green.
Totoweka, a very rare form of Greenstone - streaked or spotted with red.
Kohuwai, called after the greenish moss growth in a slow running stream.
Kawa-kawa, similar to the leaves of the pepperwood tree.
Kako-Tea, dark green with black spots.
Kahurangi (Garment of Heaven), bright green with light streaks resembling rolling clouds.


Exports of raw greenstone from New Zealand have been illegal since 1947, because of its limited supplies


Four Pendants from www.nznature.co.nz
Raw greenstone from www.nmessences.com

2006 Great Northern Celebrity Bowling Pin Shoot

We are back from the Bowling Pin shoot in Missoula Montana, tired but very happy with the results.

We stayed with Gary Marbut who has a dome house at the very end of a road waaay up in the hills overlooking more hills. A spectacular view indeed.


Whistler is a very old dog, who took a liking to me, and everytime I went outdoors she followed me around, nudging my hand with her nose so I would rub the top of her head.


On Saturday, Gary, his son Ty and grandson, Michael, Mr.C and I, went out to Deer Creek Range to set up for Sundays match. Mr.C and I went along to help, well, Mr.C helped, I sat in the shade and coped (?) with the 106 degree heat. After most of the shooting stations were set up, we all headed back to Mackenzie River Pizza Co. for some of the best tasting pizza I have ever eaten, and of course really appreciated the cooool air conditioned building.

After filling up on pizza we headed back to Gary's house. Mr.C, Gary, and Ty had a great time playing and singing along to everything from rock to blues.

While the guys were playing I went outside to watch the sunset and the deer who were enjoying the nice green grass of the irrigated lawn.

Sunday we were out in the 106F heat doing our best to shoot bowling pins off the tables. Mr.C has a cold wet washcloth under his hat to try and cool off.

Rainey getting ready to shoot bowling pins off the table. Rainey and her husband Al, Mr. C and I are members of the Central Whidbey Sportsman's Association. Al and Rainey had been away from home shooting at several events and stopped by Missoula on the way back home to shoot at this event. More HERE and HERE from Mr. C


Whooo hooo!!! Mr.C in first place, Al Lindell second place. Keewee fourth place, Rainey Lindell fifth place, and Al Slader, also from CWSA in eleventh place.
I shot my best time ever 3.64 seconds for 5 pins.

The following results are the times for two best tables out of three, each table had five pins.

Montana Shooting sports Association

.22 Pistol

Mike Gallion - 5.54
Al Lindell - 6.44
Ty Marbut - 6.84
Jennifer Kelly - 7.59
Rainy Lindell - 9.00
Jason Ritter - 9.48
Gary Marbut - 9.55
Justin Ritter - 9.73
Michael Marbut - 10.64
Bill McBroom - 10.67
Al Slader - 11.28
Mike Peterson - 11.69
Sean McBroom - 13.36
Jayson O'Neil - 15.31
Doug McBroom - 17.22
Ron Hunter - 17.97
Monica Lindeen - 45.95
Mike Fellows - 54.93

Part 5 of our trip to Juneau

Are you tired of all the pictures yet? These are the last of the photos of our wonderful vacation.

Downtown Juneau across Gastineau channel from Douglas Island, which was our home for 12 days.

Notice the tramlines, on the right side of the picture, going up the mountain. The next few pictures will be showing views from my ride up on Mount Roberts Tramway. It is a good thing I am not afraid of heights.

Downtown Juneau from the top of Mount Roberts Tramway.

Looking up towards Sheep Creek. It must have been low tide as you can see the sandbar on the left protruding out into the channel.

Dang! that is a long way down.

This huge Bald Eagle was in the raptor center at the summit of the tramway.

To give you an idea just how far up the tramway summit is, notice how small the cruise ship appears.

---

Our vacation is over, we are on Alaska Air taxiing out to take off on the first leg of our journey home.

It is quite sobering when you look toward the end of the runway and realize the plane is going to have to climb up and over those mountains.

There are many, many helicopters at the airport to cater to the tourists needs.

The building with the red roof is Dipac Hatchery.

Downtown Juneau

Up and over the mountains

Back in Washington flying over the Museum of flight. You can see the Concord top left corner.

Rocket is Upset Again

"Yes I"m mad at you. You just got back from vacation, and there you go again, taking off for the weekend. So don't mind me, I will be just fine all by myself, grrrr"

Mr. C and I are off to Montana for a fun weekend of shooting, click HERE to read all about it.

Cranberry Pork Roast

I do not intend on spending anymore time in the kitchen than I have to during this hot weather, so my new 6 quart slow cooker is being used often.

1 (3-4lb.) loin pork roast
salt and pepper to taste
1 cup finely chopped cranberries
1/4 cup honey
1 tsp. freshly grated orange peel
1/8 tsp. ground cloves
1/8 tsp. nutmeg.

Sprinkle roast with salt and pepper.
Place in slow cooker.
In small bowl combine remaining ingredients; pour over roast.
Cover and cook on low 8 to 10 hours or until roast is tender.
Slice and serve hot.


I like the way the tart cranberries, and the sweetness of the honey, compliment the delicate flavor of the pork.

Juneau Vacation - Part Four

As this was to be our last visit to Juneau, ( our friends we stay with, are moving to Washington State next year) we decided to re-visit the mendenhall Glacier.

View from the visitor center. The glacier has receded considerably the last few years.

Keewee bundled up in layers of clothing against the very cold wind, blowing down from the glacier. Riannan you should recognize this place.

The glacier still had that lovely aqua color but there was also a lot of dirty patches on the ice.

---

We also took a ride out to Montana Creek. A beautiful quiet place with wonderful scenery.

This bridge had been reduced to just enough width to walk across, or to take an ATV over, as people would drive across the bridge, up the road a ways and dump their trash. We noticed that reducing the size of the bridge did not stop someone from dumping a load of trash alongside where we parked our vehicle. It seems quite a common occurence for folk to dump their trash anywhere they wish. What a shame to ruin the beauty of this great place.

A huge tree fallen has fallen across the creek.

Common wildflower.

Another pretty wildflower.

Beauty in nature everywhere you look.

Wednesday Chuckle

Subject: Little Davie ...

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!"

After a few seconds, Little Davie stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Davie?"

"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"

**************

Little Davie watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. "Why do you do that, mommy? " he asked.

"To make myself beautiful," said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue.

"What's the matter?" asked Little Davie. "Giving up?"

****************
The math teacher saw that little Davie wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said, "Davie! Â What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?"
Little Davie quickly replied, "NBC, CBS, HBO and the Cartoon Network!"

***************
Little Davie's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person.

"Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want very badly to capture him."

Little Davie asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"

***************
Little Davie attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs, rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Davie asked, "Dad, why are you doing that?"

His father replied, "Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy."

Davie, looking worried, said, "Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom."

Thanks to Bob

Carnival of Recipes 100th Anniversary Edition

Trub from The Sediment of Life has the great honor of hosting our 100th Anniversary of Carnival Of recipes.

Stop by and check out all the fabulous recipes, everything from birthday cake to summer smoothies.

What's Going on Today

We have been back from vacation for almost a week and it is still difficult to get back in a work mode, especially when our weather is so nice. we are lucky we are not sweltering in a heatwave as much of the rest of the country is.


I have been wandering around outdoors, coffee in hand checking out all that is going on around the yard. There are three baby swallows who have left their nest under the carport, and are now perched on the powerline to the house noisily demanding to be fed by two busy parents.
These three noisy chicks are perched right above my car and the resulting mess from, food in one end, and out the other, is going to be washed off as soon as I get this post done, and of course the car is being moved from under the power lines. There is also the huge mess under the swallow's nest to be cleaned up, sigh!

Nailed across the front of the carport I have a collection of Dollar Store decorative birdhouses. It appears a wren has taken a liking to one rustic looking house and has decided to make it her own to raise a family in. We see her little beady eyes follow us as we pass by on our way in and out the front door of our home. I wonder if it is the same little wren who raised a family in there last year.

Last year we tied a piece of string across the front of the house to secure it more firmly in place as the birdhouse was just hooked to the carport by one very small nail. Momma bird was not too happy at me taking pictures so close and left the nest until I had finished with my photography.

The garden is looking great, though something is chewing holes in the leaves of some of the plants, I have already thrown slug and snail bait out there so I don't think it is those critters, my suspicion is that it coul be earwigs, Shiver!! I don't know what it is about earwigs, they creep me out.
On Sunday I decided it was time to seal the tops of the wooden fence posts surrounding the garden, and as I brushed copious amounts of the watersealer on the top of the posts and it ran down into the cracks, earwigs by the hundreds, swarmed out of the cracks wriggling and squirming and falling to the ground dead. Yah! for water seal. Now to get the other nasty earwigs who are hiding elsewhere, I believe I can lay short pieces of old garden hose on the ground and empty the earwigs out into a bucket of water in the morning. Does anyone know if this works?

The pasture is now dry and brown so the rabbits have found other places to forage for food, like our neighbors irrigated lawn and garden. The plum trees have not produced much fruit this year, but the apple trees are loaded with fruit so our rabbits are not going to go without their treats.

Juneau Vacation - Part Three

Click on pictures for larger view.

Mr.C, on the left, is fishing just outside the *no fishing* zone at Dipac hatchery. The salmon swim up the fish ladders between the dock and the bank. Even though the day was sunny, there was a cool breeze coming across the water.

Now, here is a good sized Chum salmon, or also called a dog salmon, probably about 15-16lb. Most people do not like to eat this salmon, but it is excelent smoked. Note the sharp teeth. Salmon get to be very ugly the nearer they get towards spawning.

These nice fillets are now in the freezer waiting for us to get around to processing them and getting them into the smoker. Oh, by the way, if you have noticed there are no pictures of me with a salmon, that is because I did not manage to land one this trip.

This beautiful sunny day we drove out to North Douglas Island. You are looking back across towards Juneau.

And from the same place looking in a different direction at Mendenhall Glacier.

Another day, we drove back out to Sheep Creek to see if the salmon were coming up the creek yet. They weren't, but a cruise ship sailed up Gastineau channel towards the docks, and as we looked out at the ship, a floatplane flew over the top of the ship on its way to land up the channel near the docks. You can just make out the float plane to the stern. Float planes are to Juneau what taxis are to new York.

Another day, three of us girls went out to lunch. I was lucky to have a seat by the window and excited to see a cruise ship coming in to dock and float planes coming and going, flying the never ending lines of tourists for a view of Juneau and surrounding areas.

One float plane heading out with a bunch of tourists, the other one almost ready to do the same.

When we arrived back at our home away from home, no, not this house, I took a picture of the cute log cabin on the property, which is being used for storage.