Thursday, December 31, 2009

Happy New Year


The morning after I hope you are not feeling as bad as he looks.

So, go celebrate, be careful, have a designated driver, or take a taxi.

Thank you to all my readers, family, friends, blogger friends, and all you folk who just stop by to take a look. You are all appreciated.

I wish for you all, an outstanding New Year

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Christmas as I remember it.


I would like to share my childhood memories, of our family Christmas in New Zealand, perfectly told in this song.

Link to tune




It's a real New Zealand Christmas - there's no fire, no snow, no sleigh!

Everything has come to a grinding halt and at last it's Christmas Day

We're wearing shorts and jandals, singing songs of Christmas cheer

Mum's organised the family lunch and dad'll be drinking Kiwi beer!


It's just your typical, traditional Kiwi Christmas Day

We're celebrating Christmas in the good old Kiwi way

With fresh-picked peas and new potatoes and mint sauce for the lamb

And Grandma's made the Xmas pud and she's glazed the Xmas ham!

The cards are on the mantlepiece, the tinsel is on the tree,
The rellies have brought all their presents and the Queen's face is on TV
Mum's made her own pavlova with kiwifruit on the top
And there's hokey-pokey icecream, and the Chardon's all set to pop!

It's just your typical, traditional Kiwi Christmas Day
Us kids are driving our parents daft - we've been sent outside to play
Dad's cracking another Steinie and Mum's at the kitchen sink
And Grandad's fallen asleep in his chair cos he's had too much to drink!

The temperature is nearing 30 - everyone is feeling the heat
And after lunch, we all crash out cos we had such a lot to eat!
It's great to celebrate Xmas in our special NZ way
So here's a toast to your family: Have a wonderful Xmas Day!

It's just your typical, traditional Kiwi Xmas Day
You can forget the reindeer, ice and snow, and Santa on his sleigh!
It's fun to sit in the blazing sun, enjoying a Kiwi beer
And here's a toast to you and yours: Merry Christmas, Happy New Year!!!

Sunday, December 13, 2009

86-year Old Lady's Letter to Bank

I'm not sure if this is true, but it is entertaining.

Shown below, is an actual letter that was sent to a bank by an 86 year old woman. The bank manager thought it amusing enough to have it published in the New York Times.


Dear Sir:

I am writing to thank you for bouncing my check with which I endeavored to pay my plumber last month.
By my calculations, three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check and the arrival in my account of the funds needed to honor it. I refer, of course, to the automatic monthly deposit of my entire pension, an arrangement which, I admit, has been in place for only eight years. You are to be commended for seizing that brief window of opportunity, and also for debiting my account $30 by way of penalty for the inconvenience caused to your bank. My thankfulness springs from the manner in which this incident has caused me to rethink my errant financial ways.
I noticed that whereas I personally answer your telephone calls and letters, --- when I try to contact you, I am confronted by the impersonal, overcharging, pre-recorded, faceless entity which your bank has become.

From now on, I, like you, choose only to deal with a flesh-and-blood person. My mortgage and loan repayments will therefore and hereafter no longer be automatic, but will arrive at your bank, by check, addressed personally and confidentially to an employee at your bank whom you must nominate.

Be aware that it is an offense under the Postal Act for any other person to open such an envelope. Please find attached an Application Contact which I require your chosen employee to complete. I am sorry it runs to eight pages, but in order that I know as much about him or her as your bank knows about me, there is no alternative. Please note that all copies of his or her medical history must be countersigned by a Notary Public, and the mandatory details of his/her financial situation (income, debts, assets and liabilities) must be accompanied by documented proof. In due course, at MY convenience, I will issue your employee with a PIN number which he/she must quote in dealings with me. I regret that it cannot be shorter than 28 digits but, again, I have modeled it on the number of button presses required of me to access my account balance on your phone bank service. As they say, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
Let me level the playing field even further.
When you call me, press buttons as follows:

IMMEDIATELY AFTER DIALING, PRESS THE STAR (*) BUTTON FOR ENGLISH

#1. To make an appointment to see me

#2. To query a missing payment.

#3. To transfer the call to my living room in case I am there.

#4. To transfer the call to my bedroom in case I am sleeping

#5. To transfer the call to my toilet in case I am attending to nature.

#6. To transfer the call to my mobile phone if I am not at home

#7. To leave a message on my computer, a password to access my computer is required. Password will be communicated to you at a later date to that Authorized Contact mentioned earlier.

#8. To return to the main menu and to listen to options 1 through 7.


#9. To make a general complaint or inquiry. The contact will then be put on hold, pending the attention of my automated answering service.

#10. This is a second reminder to press* for English.. While this may, on occasion, involve a lengthy wait, uplifting music will play for the duration of the call.

Regrettably, but again following your example, I must also levy an establishment fee to cover the setting up of this new arrangement. May I wish you a happy, if ever so slightly less prosperous New Year?



Your Humble Client

Monday, December 07, 2009

Email from brother

Hi sis.... it was lovely to have you visit, hope you don't pick up too many bad habits. The weather turned real sour after you left but warming up now. There's a package in transit to you, about a week from now, hopefully intact..

Ohh goody, I love packages from home, although I have a sneaking suspicion I know what could be in this one. When visiting New Zealand a couple of weeks ago, I had shown Graeme and John, my brothers, some lovely native bird garden art I had bought, and also pointed out a rather large Kiwi bird piece, which was too large to put in my suitcase. They both agreed that it would make a fine Christmas gift. I said that it would be way to expensive to send, I get the "no worries' comment from them. I love my brothers.


The very best brothers a girl could wish for.

UPDATE: The Package arrived see HERE

Sunday, December 06, 2009

Winter is here

Last evening MrC. and I enjoyed dinner at our friend's home. As we left to return home at
11:30 pm, the rain which had fallen earlier in the evening had frozen on the car. As I had had a few drinks I handed the car keys to Mr C. and said"you drive" he did not have drinks. The drive down the somewhat steep driveway was icy as was the country road out to the main highway. When we reached the main road we discovered the rain had changed to snow, and about a half an inch covered the ground. As I said on Keewee's Garden " I officially hang up my gardening gloves"

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

My visit to New Zealand


Sam is a three year old Bichon Frise who's job is to visit his Friends at Amaryllis House, a home for sufferers of Huntington's Disease, in Lower Hutt, New Zealand. Sam and his Mum belong to a group called Canine Friends Pet therapy.

You are asking how do I know this sweet little dog. I met him as he visited Amaryllis house when I was staying there with my daughter Tina. Yes, my darling daughter is a Huntington's sufferer. The main purpose of my visit to New Zealand was to celebrate Tina's 40th birthday and I was delighted to see the looks on the faces of the residents when Sam gave them a smooch.
Quote from Sam's story in the Canine Friends Pet therapy news letter:
These people are mostly pretty sick but love touching my very soft fur and they also like a good kiss. I know officially I shouldn't kiss them, but they sometimes get tears in their eyes when I smooch them, so I think that means it's OK. Some patients cannot speak much but they manage "goodbye Sam' when I go and that is nice for Mum and me.

To read more on Sam's story, click on the link above, then on news letters in the left side bar. Sam's story is Winter 09, page four. You will also see Tina and Sam, and her friend Ally who were featured in the story

I had heard of canine therapy but never seen it in action before. I was so taken by the looks on the faces of the residents as the touched Sam (the people who were able touch him) and the ones who could not, expressed their emotions with their eyes. I can tell you I had tears in my eyes as I observed their reaction to Sam's gentle way.

Thank you Sam and your Mum for bringing so my joy to the residents of Amaryllis house, I know my Tina loves to hold you when you visit, as she is an animal lover, having worked at at an animal shelter years ago when she was well.