Saturday, November 19, 2005

The Law Of Unintended Consequenses


Never bring plants into the house.


Garden Grass Snakes (also known as Garter Snakes...Thamnophissirtalis)
can be dangerous... Yes, grass snakes, not rattlesnakes.

Here's why...

A couple in Sweetwater, Texas, had a lot of potted plants. During a recent cold spell, the wife was bringing a lot of them indoors to protect them from a possible freeze.

It turned out that a little green garden grass snake was hidden in one of the plants and when it had warmed up, it slithered out and the wife saw it go under the sofa.
She let out a very loud scream.

The husband (who was taking a shower) ran out into the living room naked to see what the problem was. She told him there was a snake under the sofa.

He got down on the floor on his hands and knees to look for it. About that time the family dog came and cold-nosed him on the behind. He thought the snake had bitten him, so he screamed and fell over on the floor.

His wife thought he had a heart attack, so she covered him up, told him to lie still and called an ambulance.

The attendants rushed in, wouldn't listen to his protests and loaded him on the stretcher and started carrying him out.

About that time the snake came out from under the sofa and the Emergency Medical Technician saw it and dropped his end of the stretcher.

That's when the man broke his leg and why he is still in the hospital.

The wife still had the problem of the snake in the house, so she called on a neighbor man. He volunteered to capture the snake. He armed himself with a rolled-up newspaper and began poking under the couch. Soon he decided it was gone and told the woman, who sat down on the sofa in relief.

But while relaxing, her hand dangled in between the cushions, where she felt the snake wriggling around. She screamed and fainted, the snake rushed back under the sofa.

The neighbor man, seeing her lying there passed out, tried to use CPR to revive her.

The neighbor's wife, who had just returned from shopping at the grocery store, saw her husband's mouth on the woman's mouth and slammed her husband in the back of the head with a bag of canned goods, knocking him out and cutting his scalp to a point where it needed stitches.

The noise woke the woman from her dead faint and she saw her neighbor lying on the floor with his wife bending over him, so she assumed that he had been bitten by the snake. She went to the kitchen and got a small bottle of whiskey, and began pouring it down the man's throat.

By now the police had arrived.

They saw the unconscious man, smelled the whiskey, and assumed that a drunken fight had occurred. They were about to arrest them all, when the women tried to explain how it all happened over a little green snake.

The police called an ambulance, which took away the neighbor and his sobbing wife.

The little snake again crawled out from under the sofa.

One of the policemen drew his gun and fired at it.

He missed the snake and hit the leg of the end table. The table fell over and the lamp on it shattered and as the bulb broke it started a fire in the drapes.

The other policeman tried to beat out the flames, and fell through the window into the yard on top of the family dog who, startled, jumped out and raced into the street, where an oncoming car swerved to avoid it and smashed into the parked police car.

Meanwhile, burning drapes, were seen by the neighbors who called the fire department.

The firemen had started raising the fire truck ladder when they were halfway down the street.

The rising ladder tore out the overhead wires and put out the electricity and disconnected the telephones in a ten-square city block area (but they did get the house fire out).*

Time passed! . Both men were discharged from the hospital, the house was repaired, the dog came home,the police acquired a new car, and all was right with their world.

A while later they were watching TV and the weatherman announced a cold snap for that night. The husband asked his wife if she thought they should bring in their plants for the night.

That's when she shot him.*

Thank you to Bob for this.

Friday, November 18, 2005

KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK


Pack a Sad: Become morose, ill humoured, moody.


Thursday, November 17, 2005

RECIPE: TACOS IN PASTA SHELLS

Tacos in Pasta Shells

1 ¼ lbs. Ground beef
3oz. Cream cheese with chives, cubed and softened
1 tsp. Salt
1 tsp. Chili powder
18 jumbo pasta shells, cooked, rinsed, and drained
2 tbsp. Butter, melted
1 cup taco sauce
4 oz. Shredded cheddar cheese
4 oz. Shredded Monterey jack cheese
1 ½ cups crushed tortilla chips
1 cup sour cream
3 green onions, chopped
Lettuce, olives, cherry tomatoes (optional)

Cook beef until brown, drain fat. Reduce heat to medium low.
Add cream cheese, salt and chili powder; simmer 2 minutes
Toss shells with butter; fill with beef mixture. Arrange shells in a buttered 9x13 pan.
Pour taco sauce over each shell. Cover with foil and bake 350F for 15 minutes.
Uncover, then top with the two cheeses and crushed chips and bake until bubbly.
To serve top with sour cream and chopped onions.
Garnish with olives, tomatoes and lettuce

I like to use pepper jack cheese in place of the cheddar and have extra taco sauce on the side.



Wednesday, November 16, 2005

CAT AND MOUSE

Rocket is aptly named, as he loves to run, he streaks up and down the stairs, along the hallway and through the living room at a great rate of speed.

One of rocket's favorite places to sit and watch birds is on the corner of my computer desk. He spends a great deal of time watching the birds eating from the feeder which is stuck to the glass with suction cups.

It is fun to watch Rocket and the birds, and imagine what they are thinking. I can almost hear the birds saying, "sure glad they keep that cat indoors"
We are always telling Rocket that the birds would not be much fun to play with as they break too easily.

Rocket is a very independent cat, he loves to be petted and brushed, but does not like to sit on our laps or be picked up, he definitely is the boss around here.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Childhood Memories

Standard 3 1957 Hokowhitu School
Palmerston North New Zealand
Standard 3 is about grade 5 USA


I will not point out where I am in the photo, but I will say, I am the cutest girl.

A few weeks ago I came across some old school photos and started wondering what life had brought all these kids I had gone to school with.

I decided the way to go, was to do a Google, people search in New Zealand, and came across a web site called Old Friends. On this site you can find old school friends, people you used to work with and even friends from service clubs.

The 'Old friends' site, is set up in such a way, that you have to add the names of people you would like to hear from on 'your friends' list, then you can send an email to one of these friends through 'old friends' and the person receiving the email, can reply to your email if they so wish.

The few photographs I have kept all these years, I posted on the school web sites, entering as many names of the kids, I could remember, in the grid underneath the photos.

The response to the photos, and the messages I left on the site to be forwarded by 'Old friends' has been very rewarding, a number of people have made contact already and we are enjoying trading stories of the last 48-50 years.

I am looking forward to hearing from many more of my old school friends.

Saturday, November 12, 2005

A LESSON FROM GEESE




Geese Facts

This fall when you see geese heading south for the winter... flying along in V formation...you might consider what science has discovered as to why they fly that way:

As each bird flaps its wings, it creates an uplift for the bird immediately following. By flying in V formation the whole flock adds at least 71% greater flying range, than if each bird flew on its own.

People who share a common direction and sense of community can get where they are going more quickly and easily because they are traveling on the thrust of one another.

When a goose falls out of formation, it suddenly feels the drag and resistance of trying to go it alone... and quickly gets back into formation to take advantage of the lifting power of the bird in front. If we have as much sense as a goose, we will stay in formation with those who are headed the same way we are.

When the head goose gets tired it rotates back in the wing and another goose flies point. It is sensible to take turns doing demanding jobs...with people or with geese flying south.

Geese honk from behind to encourage those up front to keep up their speed. What do we say when we honk from behind?

Finally...and this is important...when a goose gets sick or is wounded by gunshots, and falls out of formation, two other geese fall out with that goose and follow it down to lend help and protection. They stay with the fallen goose until it is able to fly or until it dies, and only then do they launch out on their own, or with another formation to catch up with their group.

If we have the sense of a goose, we will stand by each other like that.

I was quite taken by these facts on how geese support and encourage one another,a lesson we all can afford to learn.


Friday, November 11, 2005

KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

Wobbly
what we used to say is " keewee is packing a wobbly" meaning, she is angry or being snotty!

Thursday, November 10, 2005

RECIPE: PATRIOTIC PIE

patriotic pie


Crust
1 pkg Blueberry muffin mix, with canned berries
¼ cup butter
Filling
1 8oz cream cheese
1/3 cup sugar
½ cup sour cream
1tsp. Vanilla
½ of 8oz. Tub of cool whip
Topping
Can of blueberries from mix
1 Can cherry pie filling

Preheat oven to 400F. Grease 9-inch pie plate.
For crust, place mix in medium bowl and cut in butter with pastry blender.
Spread evenly in ungreased 9-inch pan. Do not press
Bake 10 to 12 minutes. Stir, and reserve 1/2 cup of mixture for top.
Press remaining crumb mixture against bottom and sides of pie plate. Cool completely.

For filling, Beat cream cheese until smooth, gradually beat in sugar. Blend in sour cream and vanilla. Fold in cool whip and spoon into cooled crust.

For topping, spread reserved crumbs over top of filling, then decorate with canned blueberries which have been rinsed and drained, and cherry pie filling.
Chill at least 3 hours.

I also make this recipe using vanilla ice cream as a filling and seasonal fruit to decorate.




Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Steve's Flightstar

When we were in Juneau last year, our friend Steve took me up for a ride in his Flightstar. (experimental aircraft, except Steve's is way beyond, being experimental)

We were flying around over Juneau, enjoying the view, when Steve asked me if I would like to experience a stall.(You have to understand that I am a real chicken when it comes to dropping from heights, I won't even ride a roller coaster.)

I thought to myself, "OK, this is an experience of a life time, just do it"

I looked at Steve and said OK, hoping I did not look as nervous as I felt.

You would have been proud of me, when the nose of the Flightstar was pointed up just before the drop! I was thinking, "this is fun," then down the Flightstar went, just a little way, as Steve did not want to scare me too much. I will admit I had my eyes closed during the drop thinking if I could not see anything it would not feel so extreme, and it didn't.

I did experience that feeling in the pit of my stomach when you fall from a height, but it lasted for such a short time that I was Ok with it, and when the stall was over and we were flying level again, I said to my self," Whew! I did it, but I don't think I want do it again."

I was happy to have this experience, and I still feel the same about roller coasters.

For a look at a picture of the Flightstar you can go to Mr.Completely's site and view it by clicking HERE



Saturday, November 05, 2005

Carnival Of Recipes

This week, Carnival of recipes #64 is being hosted by Pajama Pundits.
The cool weather has folks thinking nice warming comfort food like soups.
Go on over to Pajama Pundits and take a look at all the wonderful recipes.

Friday, November 04, 2005

RADICAL RODENT

Now I have your attention!

Have you ever seen ' A real Radical right-Wing riflerodent?

NO, well CLICK HERE and visit The Conservative UAW Guy


KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

TIP: dump or recycling depot.

When I was a kid, my brothers and I always rode with Dad to the tip.
It was always interesting to see what 'treasures' people were throwing away.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

ONE POT TACO SOUP



ONE POT TACO SOUP

2lbs hamburger
1 onion – chopped
1 15oz. can corn
1 15oz. can chili beans
1 15oz. Can kidney beans
1 15oz. Can diced tomatoes
1 lg. Can V8 juice
1 env. Taco seasoning

I like to brown then drain the hamburger before putting it in the crock pot.
Open all cans , Do not drain
Place all ingredients in large crock pot, simmer 4 to 6 hours
To serve, top with shredded cheese and sour cream.
Have your favorite corn chips on the side.

It is so nice to come home to a hot meal, especially if you have spent time outside in the cold.



Tuesday, November 01, 2005

HOW TO GIVE YOUR CAT A PILL



Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in left arm and repeat process.

Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw away soggy pill.

Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of mouth with right forefinger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call spouse from garden.

Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap. Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing later.

Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

Check label to make sure pill not harmful to humans, drink 1 beer to take taste away. Apply Band-Aid to spouse's forearm and remove blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

Retrieve cat from neighbors shed. Get another pill. Open another beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door onto neck to leave head showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat with elastic band.

Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges. Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold compress to cheek and check records for date of last tetanus jab. Apply Whiskey compress to cheek to disinfect. Toss back another shot. Throw t-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

Ring fire department to retrieve the cat from tree across the road. Apologize to neighbor who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid cat. Take last pill from foil-wrap.

Tie the cats front paws to rear paws with garden twine and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves from shed.

Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak. Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour 2 liters of water down throat to wash pill down.

Consume remainder of Scotch. Get spouse to drive you to the emergency room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order new table.

Arrange for RSPCA to collect mutant cat from Hades, and ring local pet shop to see if they have any hamsters.


HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL:

01. Wrap it in bacon.



MAUI AND THE MAGIC FISH HOOK

I grew up hearing the myth about how Maui fished New Zealand up out of the ocean.
Grampapinhead has the story HERE for you to read.

Sunday, October 30, 2005

Blogger Blastorama

Analogkid and Mollbot go head to head.

We started our day off at the pin range. Analogkid and I had our challenge shoot out, I did manage to win that one, but was beat in the next round by Mollbot. Mollbot, in his turn was beat by JimP.

Mr. Completely shooting his .38 Special wheelgun

Our pumpkin targets

My 22 Beretta just made kinda' neat little holes in the pumpkins, but when I shot Analogkid's 9mm CZ there were nice big holes. What fun!!!

JimP, Mr. Completely and Mollbot intent on making pumpkin puree

Into the garbage with these pieces

Anyone want some Used pumpkin?

Analogkid and Molbot showing what a rifle will do to pumpkins.

We had done our pumpkin shooting at the pistol range, and now have set up at the rifle range. Besides pumpkins, we had cue chalk to shoot at, so cool to see the puff of chalk when it is hit.

Mr. completely shooting Analogkid's Boomershoot rifle

chalk target exploding

Pretty exciting when the chalk is hit. If you look close, on the right side you can see the puff of chalk dust.

Now go to Mr.Completely's site to see more on our fun day.

Friday, October 28, 2005

KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

Good as Gold: a job well done; not a problem;
an affirmative answer - as in

Q " do you mind if I pay for this later"?

A " Good as gold mate"

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Thursday chuckle

Thanks to Linda


Project no 1 finished

Before

The upstairs bathroom was painted in a very dark color which made the room seem rather gloomy. The window shade was right out of the 80's, that had to go.

The new look

The walls are now a white with a hint of a pinkish beige, a color I took from the wallpaper border which you can see around the top of the walls. The new window shade is a soft beige also.
All I need now are towels in a blue shade to match the color in the wallpaper border.

Wallpaper border

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Eye Teaser

Old Man Or two People

What can you see? look carefully. There are quite a number of these 'eye teaser' pictures out there. I will try to find some more for your enjoyment.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Computer problems?



Does your PC breakdown and give you grief?

It might be because you’re a wimp.

Try one of these self-assertive maintenance techniques

Approach the problem machine in a confident manner. Let it think that you don’t care if it works or not. Like dogs, computers can smell fear.

If others are watching always be ready for a machine to start working of its own accord. Rehearse lines like : “There I thought that would work”.

Wave the reference manual at the machine. If you don’t have one use any technical manual close at hand, the weightier the better. This has the effect of invoking spirits friendly to your cause and may convince the machine to give up without a struggle.

Try percussive maintenance . This involves gently lifting the unco-operative device about 100mm above the desk as though looking for something underneath. You them suddenly drop the beast. This often completely fixes the fault.

If you are at work and the PC is relatively untraceable, get in early in the morning and simply swap your broken machine with a working model in another department.

If there is a danger that the serial numbers are kept somewhere, make sure that you’ve swapped all of your machines round long before they break. (This is called ” preventative maintenance ”) That way when you swap them back after yours breaks, you end up with the one you should have had all along, and no one can point the finger.

If none of the above works, consider taking out a contract on the machine - $100 slipped to the office cleaner will usually arrange a suitable “accident” such as falling down the stairs. It will also serve as a warning to the other machines that you’re not to be fooled



Sunday, October 23, 2005

Blogger Blastorama Update

YES the rumor is true.
I Keewee, challenge AnalogKid, to a duel at dawn, errr, make that noon, on October 30th.
The challenge will be at the bowling pin range, full size bowling pins set on the back of the tables with any handgun, any sights, regular pin shooting rules, two tables out of three.

Mr.Completely and Jim P. are at it again!

Yesterdays pin top shoot was the usual stiff competition colored with humor and kidding around.

Mr. Completely, Jim P, and I were standing watching some of the shooters,
(Jim P and Mr. Completely are Arch Rivals, they are both always kidding around planning how to be devious and out-shoot one another.) when I happened to turn just in time to see Mr. C reach out and quickly pluck one wayward hair out of Jim P’s goatee. I swear Jim went about four feet straight up in the air.

My mouth dropped open in surprise at what Mr. C did, then I started to laugh, but you should have seen the look on Jim’s face, it was priceless, where is a camera when you need one?
At first there was a startled expression on Jim’s face, followed by a “ I am going to beat you into the ground” look, followed by another look of “payback is on it’s way!” then we were all laughing.
Mr. Completely better watch out, Jim P is already planning revenge.

As usual, we had a fun time yesterday. Go HERE for Mr. Completely’s write-up on the days events and to see a great picture of Pegi and Scruffy.

SUNDAY READING

After yesterdays sunshine we have a damp gloomy morning, a perfect time to stay indoors and read your favorite blogs.
One of my favorites is Grampapinhead. This morning I am going to check out
'SUNDAY....BEST OF THE WEEK' why don't you go check it out for yourself and see what I mean.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

PIN SHOOT RESULTS

The optical sight class results
click on picture for better view


The picture is not the best, but you can see Mike (Mr. Completely) won and I managed third place. After timing in, I shot against Dean narrowly beating him, next I faced Rainey and was lucky to get by her. THEN had to shoot against Mike. I got my butt kicked.
Just wait until next year, I have all winter to practice.

Pin Shoot Today

OUCH! OUCH! OUCH!

Today Mr. Completely and I are off to a bowling pin shoot. It is, if I remember correctly, the second to last one for the season.

I am looking out the window and the day is a beautiful sunny one, how lucky are we to have such a good day at this time of year?

There may or may not be a report on my shooting later today, depends how I do.

Next Sunday we are going to have a 'Blogger Blastorama'. A bunch bloggers and our friends are going to get together at the range and puverize a few pumkins. Oh Boy!! I am looking forward to this shoot. Mr. Completely has some more information CLICK HERE


Friday, October 21, 2005

RECIPE; Hot 'N' Honeyed Chicken Wings

Hot 'N' Honeyed Chicken Wings


3 pounds chicken wings
¾ cup Pace Picante Sauce
2/3 cup honey
1/3 cup soy sauce
¼ cup dijon-style mustard
3 tbsp. vegetable oil
2 tbsp. grated fresh ginger
½ tsp. Grated orange peel
additional Pace Picante sauce

Cut off and discard wing tips; cut each wing in half at joint. Place in 13x9-inch baking dish.
Combine ¾ cup picante sauce, honey, soy sauce, mustard, oil, ginger and orange peel in small bowl; mix well. Pour over chicken wings. Cover and refrigerate at least 6 hours or overnight.
Preheat oven to 400F. Place chicken wings and sauce in single layer on foil-lined 15x10-inch jelly-roll pan. Bake 40 to 45 minutes or until golden brown.
Serve warm with additional picante sauce. Garnish as desired.


KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

Cackhanded: Left handed, southpaw

Thursday, October 20, 2005

A QUESTION ANSWERED

SGT Ron Long of, They Call Us," Doc", was asked several questions by Bob, who is 100% against the Iraq war, but has always been pro military.
SGT Ron Long answered Bob's Questions just as you would expect.
Go read Courteous but WRONG for yourself.

New Element Discovered--"Governmentium"

We do not laugh enough, Mr. Completely has just the medicine.
HERE is your prescription. Go check it out.

Youthful Memories

Almost the same as one I used to own

Grampapinhead posed the question, "Anyone remember being young....as easy?" I must say that at times it wasn't easy.

Grampapinhead made mention of the 'big old yellow school bus' and this brought to mind my school days and how I got to school.

When I was five years old I was within walking distance of my first school, but after a couple of months my dad started building our second home. This meant moving from the house in the city, Palmerston North, to our bach, (beach house) at Foxton beach while our new house was being built.

At this time, my mother did not drive, dad left for the city early every morning, there wasn't a school bus route anywhere near our home, and the school was about five miles away, soooo, I had to learn to ride a push bike (kiwi talk for bicycle), in a BIG hurry.

You think this was easy? H**L NO! The roads all around us were unpaved, just sand which was covered with cut flax placed across the tire tracks.
You know what flax is don't you? it is a tough grass looking plant, used as an ornamental in our gardens. The variety they used on the roads used to grow probably three to four feet tall.

Just use your imagination what it was like to be just five years old, have a father who was somewhat impatient, holding onto the back of your bike, and you trying to keep your balance on the flax covered sandy road while learning to ride your first bike.

The pressure was on me, I had to learn to ride that bike or walk the five mile to school. As you can imagine I mastered riding that bike in about three days, OOOH the freedom, I can still recall the feeling of riding my own bicycle to school for the first time.

I was nervous and excited at the same time, and had to be extra careful on probably about half the roads near the school as these were just loose gravel and there were ( as I remember) rather large rocks to dodge.

Our new home was completed in about four months so back to the city we moved, where I had paved roads all the way to school.

On my thirteenth birthday I received a brand new Raleigh bicycle, much the same as in the picture. It did not have gears, it was a darker green, and had a bright shiny bell.

I rode that bicycle until I finished highschool which was near six miles from home.


Wednesday, October 19, 2005

IF BUD ABBOTT AND LOU COSTELLO WERE ALIVE TODAY

ABBOTT AND COSTELLO



If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch,
"Who's on first?" might have turned out something like this:


COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.

ABBOTT: Your computer?

COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.

ABBOTT: What about Windows?

COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?

ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?

COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.

COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!

ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".

COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. OK, forget that. Can I watch movies on the Internet?

ABBOTT: Yes, you want Real One.

COSTELLO: Maybe a real one, maybe a cartoon. What I watch is none of your business. Just tell me what I need!

ABBOTT: Real ! One.

COSTELLO: If it's a long movie, I also want to watch reels 2, 3, and 4. Can I watch them?

ABBOTT: Of course.

COSTELLO: Great! With what?

ABBOTT: Real One.

COSTELLO: OK, I'm at my computer and I want to watch a movie. What do I do?

ABBOTT: You click the blue "1".

COSTELLO: I click the blue one what?

ABBOTT: The blue "1".

COSTELLO: Is that different from the blue w?

ABBOTT: The blue "1" is Real One and the blue "W" is Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: But there are three words in "office for windows"!

ABBOTT: No, just one. But it's the most popular Word in the world.

COSTELLO: It is?

ABBOTT: Yes, but to be fair, there aren't many other Words left. It pretty much wiped out all the other Words out there.

COSTELLO: And that word is real one?

ABBOTT: Real One has nothing to do with Word. Real One isn't even part of Office.

COSTELLO: STOP! Don't start that again. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!



(A few days later)



ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on "START".......


Thanks to my friend Linda R


Sunday, October 16, 2005

Carnival Of Recipes

Carnival of Recipes is up.
The carnival is featuring Pork along with many other great recipes.
Click HERE to check them out.

Chuckle of the week

I know it is a little out dated, but it is still funny

New Zealand Goes To War

Picture Saddam Hussein sitting in his office contemplating the current crisis and drinking coffee... His phone rings…

"Kia Ora", would that be Saddam Hussein?"

"Hello, yes, this is Saddam speaking, who is this and what do you want?"

"Well now Saddam this is Rangi, and I'm ringing from the Lonely Arms Pub in Auckland, New Zealand, to tell you that we are officially declaring war on you"

"Well, Rangi," Saddam replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"

"Right now," said Rangi, after a moment's calculation, "there is myself, my cousin Toru, my next door neighbour Rua, and the entire dart team from the Pub. That makes eight altogether"

Saddam paused. "I must tell you, Rangi that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."

"Heck!" said Rangi. "I'll have to ring you back!"

Sure enough, the next day, Rangi calls again. "Bro, its me again Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to get the hold of some infantry equipment!"

"And what equipment would that be, Rangi?" Saddam asked.

"Well, we've got two tractors, a bulldozer, and the loan of Rua’s Honda 90"

Saddam sighed. "I must tell you, Rangi, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armoured personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to 11/2 million since we last spoke."

"Are you tricking me!" said Rangi. "I'll have to get back to you on that one"

Sure enough, Rangi rings again the next day. "Mr. Hussein, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've modified Ewen Smiths micro-light with a couple of 12 bore double barrel shotguns in the cockpit, and four bro's from the golf club have joined us as well!"

Saddam was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat.

"I must tell you, Rangi, that I have 1,000 bombers and 2,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface- to-air missile sites and since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"

"E mea, te riri nei au!" said Rangi, "I'll have to ring you back."

Sure enough next day, Rangi calls again "Kia Ora this morning', Mr.Hussein! I am sorry to tell you that we have had to call off the war."

"I'm sorry to hear that," said Saddam. "Why the sudden change of heart?"

"Well," said Rangi, "we've all had a long chat over a couple of Beers, and decided there's no way we can feed two million prisoners.

Friday, October 14, 2005

RECIPE: Brownie Cheesecake

Brownie Cheesecake

This recipe tastes so good I am almost tempted to start back on the good old Kiwi tradition of morning tea at 10am and afternoon tea at 3pm so I can have an extra two pieces per day.

BROWNIE CHEESESCAKE


1 pkg. German chocolate cake mix
½ cup shredded coconut
1/3 cup softened butter or margarine
1 egg
2 (8oz ) pkgs cream cheese
2eggs
¾ cup sugar
2 tsp. Vanilla
2 cups sour cream
¼ cup sugar
1 T. vanilla

Heat oven to 350F In large mixer bowl blend cake mix, coconut, butter and 1 egg until mixture is crumbly.

Press very lightly in ungreased baking pan 13 x 8 x 2 inches.

Beat cream cheese, 2 eggs, ¾ cup sugar and 2tsp. Vanilla until smooth and fluffy.

Spread over cake mixture. Bake 20 to 25 minutes or until top is firm in center.

Mix sour cream, ¼ cup sugar and 1 tablespoon vanilla until smooth.

Spread over the cheesecake: cool.

Refrigerate at least 8 hours.

Makes 20 servings.



KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

Colly Wobbles:a feeling of nausea usually associated with nervousness; as in "bungee jumping gave me a dose of the colly wobbles"

Thursday, October 13, 2005

At the end of the rainbow

Y'all can quit looking for the pot at the end of the rainbow-
It has been found


Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Eye Teaser

These eye teaser pictures are really quite interesting and well done.

Saturday, October 08, 2005

Recipe: Cheeseburger Pie

When the weather turns cold, I start looking for "comfort food"

1 package crescent rolls
1 pound hamburger
1/2 small onion, chopped
1/2 tsp. oregano
1/4 tsp. basil
salt and pepper to taste
1 (6oz) can tomato paste
1 (8oz) package mozzarella cheese

Press crescent rolls into pie crust pan.
Brown hamburger,onion,oregano,basil,Drain.
Add tomato paste,then salt and pepper to taste.
Pour into pie shell. Top with sliced cheese.
Bake at 425F for 15-20 minutes.

Friday, October 07, 2005

KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

Cods Wollop: untrue statement or remark is referred to as a "load of cods wollop".

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Lazy Day

Anacortes Marina


My friend, Joyce, emailed a couple of days ago and asked if I would like to ride with her to Anacortes today, as I had a day off work I said I was happy to go along.
We were too early for Joyce's appointment, so drove to the marina and wandered around for a while.

As I was looking out across the moored boats, I said to myself, "I wonder how many of these hundreds of boats are used on a regular basis"

Reminds me of the saying, " the two happiest times in a boat owners life" are, when he buys the boat, and when he sells it. There could be some truth in this statement.




Monday, October 03, 2005

Looter Shooter

It's actually a little duckie

I went out to the range this evening and shot my entry in the "Looter Shooter" e-Postal match.

It was shot from ten yards behind cover, including cardboard boxes and a garbage can.

My score wasn't too bad, one hundred out of one hundred possible, with four duckie hits.
Mr. Completely commented "not bad for a girl"


Sunday, October 02, 2005

Carnival Of Recipes

Carnival Of recipes #58 is up.
There are some wonderful recipes. To see all that is to offer click Here

Saturday, October 01, 2005

e-Postal Handgun Match #3 Jack-N-Jill

Funny how time seems to get away from us.

Here I was thinking I had plenty of time to polish my shooting skills so I can partner Mr.Completely in the Jack-N-Jill postal hand gun match.

Mr C. has been shooting way longer than I have, and has the whole routine down pat, you know, the stance, the grip etc and etc.

Me, well, I am still working on it. Sometimes when I do not shoot as well as I usually do, I ask myself "what the heck am I doing wrong now, what have I changed, is my grip different, have I changed my stance?" like Mr.C. reminds me, practice, practice practice!

OK I admit, I do not practice as much as I should, then again, I am not as serious a shooter as Mr. C, I shoot more for fun, and it really does not matter too much to me if I win or not, though that being said, I do not care to come dead last, so I guess I had better get my butt out there to the range and get some real practice in, so I can be the best partner I can be, in the Jack-n-Jill postal match.

To read more about how the J & J match works and all the rules, click Here



Friday, September 30, 2005

New Favorites

I have just added to "My Favorite Bloggers" two blogs I enjoy reading. The first being,

Morning Coffee & Afternoon Tea, and chocolate in between

I love this blog, as there are all kinds of interesting articles and facts on coffee, tea and chocolate.

Fantastic recipes for wonderful coffee/chocolate drinks, chocolate chip pudding pie and many others. It makes my mouth water just reading it all.

You will also find links to other Coffee and Tea blogs.

The second blog is,

Mostly Cajun-All American

This blog is written by a Cajun from Louisiana.

One of his stories is about Hurricane Rita and the devastation to his home and life.

When Mostly Cajun returned to his damaged home after Rita passed by, he realized he needed to go get a wet vac from his office to clean up the water.When he returned to his home he found it was on fire.

Sadly all was lost, including four much loved pets, cats named Itty, Splot, Mollie and Callie.
This is a most touching story.

I realized I was reading a story written by an extraordinary person, and this was not the only story, So, go read his stories for yourself, you will see what I am talking about.

You will find the links to these two blogs on the right in MY FAVORITE BLOGGERS




Recipe: Blueberry -Banana Pie

Blueberry-Banana Pie

8 oz cream cheese
3 tsp. lemon juice
2 tsp. Vanilla
1 3/4 cup powdered sugar
1 pt. Whipping cream
1 can Comstock blueberry pie filling
2 bananas
2 baked pie shells


Cream together cream cheese, 2 teaspoons lemon juice, vanilla and sugar.
Fold in stiff whipped cream. (I whip this before I cream the other ingredients.)
Line pie shells with thin sliced bananas.
Pour cream mixture over bananas and refrigerate for one hour.
Stir one teaspoon of lemon juice into pie filling and spread over cream mixture.


This recipe is easy to make, and tastes soooo good.

Mr. Completely loves to be “the taste tester”


KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

My blog had been down since yesterday afternoon.
After several emails back and forth to Blogger all is now fixed.
I am....

Chuffed: pleased; as in "she was dead chuffed"

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Coffee, Tea, chocolate

For all of you who enjoy coffee, tea and chocolate, I have found a blog which has all kinds of fun interesting information. So for a fun read click on the link below.

Morning Coffee & Afternoon Tea

Monday, September 26, 2005

Full story

Mr Completely has a full report on the trip to Lake Mayfield, go Here

Lake Mayfield Trip

Part of Mayfield Resort as seen from the island

Another view from the island

There is a small bridge from the end of the dock to the island

Keewee and Mr Completely on the island


Mr Completely and John heading out for some fishing

The Gang
Don, David, Dennis, John, Mike

Friday, September 23, 2005

KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

ooops, I nearly forgot Kiwi word of the week.

Brilliant: excellent; great; wonderful

Blog Alert!

Mr.Completely and I are pretty much burned out, so we have loaded our RV and are heading to Lake Mayfield for a couple of days.

My idea of packing for a break is, a bottle of wine, a good book to read, already prepared food to be reheated, and fishing equipment. All of this will be used, in what order, I do not know, it will be decided when we get there.

Providing the weather co-operates, I will have pictures and a report, maybe on Monday evening.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

RECIPE: MISSISSIPPI SIN

MISSISSIPPI SIN

1 loaf round Hawaiian bread
11/2 cups sour cream
11/2 cups chopped ham
1 (8-oz) cream cheese, softened
1/3 cup chopped onions
2 cups shredded cheddar cheese
1/3 cup chopped chilies
Dash of worcestershire sauce

Slice off top of bread and hollow out. Mix all ingredients and put inside bread. Put top back on bread. Wrap in foil. Bake at 350F for 1 hour. Use pieces of bread and crackers for dippers.

I use 2 ( 4-0z )cans of chopped chilies, but I like chilies, you may only like to use one can.



Tuesday, September 20, 2005

WHAT I WAS REALLY DOING...........

For those of you who thought I was goofing off today.

I have spent most of the day washing the bathroom walls then painting on two coats of undercoat.

The old color was a kind of pukey salmon pink color, see the window frame, well the whole bathroom was that color.It was so dark it felt like walking into a cave.

There is still some undercoating, the top coat, and a wall paper border to do before the bathroom will be finished

When I finish this project I will post before and after photos.


Sunday, September 18, 2005

PIN SHOOT RESULTS




Keewee Qualifying

Well, can't say I did not try my best.

I timed in way down in the pack.

First up, I shot against Dean and just squeaked by, then Greg and I were up.

By now, my adrenalin had kicked in, I gritted my teeth, told those pins how I was going to blow them into tiny pieces, and waited for the starting buzzer.

Buzzzzz, and I blazed away.

Greg won that round.

Like I said, Can't say I did not do my best.

For the full report go to Mr. Completely's site.




PIN SHOOTIN' DAY

The sun is shining, the birds are singing, there is a slight breeze, what more could you ask for when you go to a pin shoot?

How about all the "accuracy gods" on your side, and my new prescription glasses, which I will not have until next week.

I say my new bifocal glasses will help, but I have a feeling there will be a little adjustment time, so there may be some not so accurate shooting for a while.

There may be a report on Mr. C's and my shooting experience later on today, all depends on the results.

I may be too embarrassed to post results.

Friday, September 16, 2005

KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

Shandy: drink made with lemonade (7UP) and beer

This is a drink many ladies who don't like the taste of strong beer prefer.
A nice drink in the heat of summer.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Recipe: BLT DIP

Now the weather is cooling down, and the football and hockey season is here, we need good snack food for in front of the television,
Here is a good easy recipe to fix and eat while watching TV

1 lb bacon
1 loaf bread
1(16-oz) ctn sour cream
1/2 cup mayonnaise
1 lg tomato (take out seeds & juice)

Fry bacon until crisp. Cool and break into small pieces. Dice tomato.
Mix sour cream and mayonnaise.
Add tomato and bacon pieces.
Toast 1 loaf of bread and cut in triangles. Serve toast on side for dipping.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

AMEN FOR AMERICA

I Love This Comeback

One of my sons serves in the military. He is still stateside, here in California. He called me yesterday to let me know how warm and welcoming people were to him, and his troops, everywhere he goes, telling me how people shake their hands, and thank them for being willing to serve, and fight, for not only our own freedoms but so that others may have them also.

But he also told me about an incident in the grocery store he stopped at yesterday, on his way home from the base. He said that ahead of several people in front of him stood a woman dressed in a burkha. He said when she got to the cashier she loudly remarked about the U.S. flag lapel pin the cashier wore on her smock. The cashier reached up and touched the pin, and said proudly," Yes, I always wear it and probably always will."

The woman in the burkha then asked the cashier when she was going to stop bombing her countrymen, explaining that she was Iraqi.

A gentleman standing behind my son stepped forward, putting his arm around my son's shoulders, and nodding towards my son, said in a calm and gentle voice to the Iraqi woman.

"Lady, hundreds of thousands of men and women like this young man have fought and died so that YOU could stand here, in MY country and accuse a check-out cashier of bombing YOUR countrymen. It is my belief that had you been this outspoken in YOUR own country, we wouldn't need to be there today. but, hey, if you have now learned how to speak out so loudly and clearly, I'll gladly buy you a ticket and pay your way back to Iraq so you can straighten out the mess in YOUR country that you are obviously here in MY country to avoid."

Everyone within hearing distance cheered!

I would be cheering just as loud as everyone there.

Thank you to Bob for this one

Sunday, September 11, 2005

New Zealand History

Photo:Francis Prout
Ta Moko
The photo shows male and female faces carved into the trunk of a large tree. Both faces show Maori facial tattoos or Ta Moko.

The history of the Maori people and their stories make for interesting reading.

I remember sitting in class as a young child, listening intently to the Maori myths and legends our teacher read to us.

New Zealand In History is a site I found to have a lot of information.
To learn more about the Maori people of New Zealand , click Here



Friday, September 09, 2005

Carnival of Recipes

The Carnival of Recipes is up.

There are some fantastic recipes for you to try. Go check them out Here

Carnival of Cordite is Up

The Carnival of Cordite Special Double Edition is out.

All kinds of Neat gun stuff.

click Here

Milestone


Considering Keewee's Corner was originally created just for family and friends, it sure has expanded. Much to my delight, I have visitors from all around the globe. Thank you to all who visit my blog making my (fun) work all worthwhile.


KIWI WORD OF THE WEEK

Skiting:(rhymes with fighting) bragging; showing off

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Photo practice

Dahlia

Godetia

Mimulus


Last Christmas I was given a little pocket size samsung camera.
Today, I took it out to my garden to see how well it does with close up shots, for a small camera it does reasonably well.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

POSTAL MATCH

The results for e- postal match are up, check them out here at Mr. Completely's blog.

RECIPE: PINEAPPLE SURPRISE

1 Box vanilla wafers
1 stick butter or margarine
3 c powdered sugar
2 (8-oz) pkgs. cream cheese (softened)
1 tsp vanilla
2 Bananas
20- oz can crushed pineapple
16- oz tub cool whip

Crush wafers and use as bottom layer in 9 x 13- inch dish. Melt butter and pour over wafers. Beat powdered sugar and cream cheese with 1 tsp vanilla. Pour over wafers. Slice bananas for next layer. Add drained pineapple. Cover with cool whip. Garnish with pecans, cherries or sprinkles.


GAS GAUGE

MY NEW GAS GAUGE

This sure makes sense the way the gas prices are going up.
Thanks to J for the picture.



Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Postal match

One of my ten targets. The center circle is only 1/2" across!


Today I finally got around to shooting Mr. Completely's postal match.

I used my Beretta U22 Neos to shoot five targets free standing then five targets from a bench rest, I don't think I have anything to skite about. (you will have to see kiwi word of the week on Friday) but then again I am not totally embarrassed.

Results will be posted Tuesday evening by Mr. Completely.

Friday, September 02, 2005

YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2005 when.

1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.

2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.

4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.

5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.

6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.

7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.

8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.

10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.

11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )

12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.

14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.

15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.

kiwi word of the week

Chuffed: pleased: as in, "he was dead chuffed"

Tiki tour: roundabout way to get somewhere: scenic tour



Thursday, September 01, 2005

THURSDAY'S CHUCKLE

You may have read this before, so read it again. After all, "laughter is the best medicine"

Words of wisdom

I am in shape.
Round is a shape.
*************************
Time may be a great healer,
but it's a lousy beautician.
***************************
Never be afraid to try something new.
Remember, amateurs built the ark, professionals built the Titanic.
***************************
Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels good.
***************************
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
***************************
Even if you are on the right track,
you'll get run over if you just sit there.
***************************
Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly and for the same reason.
***************************
An optimist thinks this is the best possible world.
A pessimist fears this is true.
**************************
There will always be death and taxes;
however, death doesn't get worse every year.
***************************
In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.
***************************
I am a nutritional overachiever.
***************************
I plan on living forever. So far, so good.
***************************
Practice safe eating -- always use condiments.
***************************
A day without sunshine is like night.
***************************
It's frustrating when you know all the answers,
but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
***************************
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time,
but also to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
***************************
Brain cells come and brain cells go,
but fat cells live forever.
***************************
Age doesn't always bring wisdom.
Sometimes it comes alone.
***************************
Life not only begins at forty,
it also begins to show.
**************************
I smile because you are my friend!
I laugh because there is nothing you can do about it.