Monday, August 07, 2006


1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

3. No one expects you to run--anywhere.

4. People call at 9 PM and ask, " Did I wake you ???? "

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

7. Things you buy now won't wear out.

8. You can eat dinner at 4 PM.

9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

13. You sing along with elevator music.

14. Your eyes won't get much worse.

15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

16. Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the
national weather service.

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

19. You can't remember who sent you this list

And you notice these are all in Big Print for your convenience.

Thanks to Lou G


Phyllis said...

Number 16 is oh so true!!!
My back has been killing me the past two days!!

Ginco said...

Haaahaaaha!! I,m laughing
my tail off, haahaahaa!!!
That is sooo funny.

steve said...

that is all so true number nine and 12 do it for me, I take my flasses uff and id akk a glurr

Anonymous said...

Can't wait for number 12 to happen to me!